i can't hate you.
and even as much as i try to stay away.
i can't.
but still.
i'm trying.
maybe it was something i said that cause you to just ignore me.
sorry.
i'm fond of contradicting myself.
maybe i can't handle not talking to you at all.
but hey,
i'm forcing myself to.
the end is near i say.
its true.
we say we try to start the friendship all over again.
to get to know each other all over again.
but fuck.
that didn't work now did it?

i'll try to keep myself for messaging you.
or calling you.
unless the need occurs.
but yeah.
you can call me if you see fit.


stop scolding me already lah.
i got my off day and i'm not working.
i'm getting my rest.
have fun collecting you laptop!

i miss sher.
i miss going back to church.
sorry God.
that i didn't go for mass cause nessa was sick.
maybe thats why all this has been happening.
but hey.
i'm surrounding myself with everything positive.
to keep my head up.
yeah.


thank you for forgiveness.
thank you for making work not dreadful.
cause i didn't want to work to suck.
but then again.
i don't know how to go about doing this.

i just woke up.
but i want to go to sleep again.
maybe this just shows how tired i am.

nessa should just stop crying now.
period.